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2007​-​2011

by ansgaros

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1.
How? 04:18
Days have passed Since I heard your frightened scream Those days have felt like years No more can I hear you speak No more can you listen to me I'm all alone again How can I live When the only thing I have left Is the image of you? How can I die When I know there's no afterlife? There is no paradise Years have passed Since I found your lifless body Those years have felt like an eternity No more can I hear them speak No more can they listen to me Grief has taken me over How can I feel When the only thing I feel Is the pain of losing you? How can I dream When every time I close my eyes I see you? Like an arrow shot through my heart This love kills me And it's tearing me apart I'm one with misery How can I cry When my tears have run dry So long ago How can I be When it's been so long since I Drew my last breath
2.
3.
4.
Banquet 02:53
5.
THE PEOPLE: We try to run away from this insane oppression There has to be a better place, somewhere safe Safe from harm, safe from rape, no senseless violence there That is our ideal world, where is our ideal world? And as we scream "Utopia!" Our world tomorrow ends Scream "Utopia!" In the dead of night our plan is set in motion Harvesting the seeds of our ultimate devotion No looking back now, it's too late for regrets We're getting out of this place "Toward freedom!" And as we scream "Utopia!" Our world tomorrow ends Scream "Utopia!" DICTATOR: How can you think of leaving? You ingrates! You have food and shelter My reign is just Oh, I can not let you go And so ends this story, it ends in my glory Nations rise, nations fall but mine is forever Now let this be a warning to those still left alive Don't go against me or... you'll surely die! THE PEOPLE: And as we scream "Utopia!" Our world tomorrow ends Still we scream "Utopia!"
6.
VERSE 1: There used to be a fire inside me But now that fire is long gone And the embers that remain will soon burn through I'm growing cold and time goes on PRE-CHORUS 1: Where there used to be a light Now only shadow remains My soul is dark CHORUS: So long ago since I really felt a thing And now I wonder How long I can keep up the charade Act as if everything was fine When I'm falling apart VERSE 2: All alone again I sit here and I think Going through the things I feel This silence slowly eating away my will to live There is no light, no rescue in sight PRE-CHORUS 2: Every day it's the same old thing I dwell on my own suffering No one may ever see What I hold inside Where there used to be a light Now only shadow remains I'm so alone CHORUS "One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love." - Sophocles What is... love? CHORUS I'm falling apart
7.
8.
There was something I wanted to tell you That's why I called you on your cell I let it ring but you did not answer That's how I knew something was wrong I drove up to your place And let myself in. I'll never forget the expression on your face When I found you dead CHORUS: How could I have known That this imitation of a life you led Was nothing more than a show Should I have known? I thought we shared our secrets I thought that we were best friends But now it's too late Now that you are gone Looking back on the years I spent with you You never really opened up You kept it all inside of you Until this one day... You left behind a note, it said: " Look, I'm sorry, but I just couldn't handle the pressure anymore. I took the easy out." CHORUS Remembering the good times that we had I know you're never coming back no matter how I cry And still I wonder why you didn't say anything... Not a word CHORUS
9.
You live your life in fear Fear of what might be If you took a few steps Towards reality Petrified by the thought of social encounters You're trapped behind this wall you've built Now! CHORUS: Tear down this wall Free yourself from the prison of your mind Go ahead, throw away all your fears How did you ever survive All these years of your life? Hiding from the real world "No action needed on my part" - That's what you always thought And the world, it passed you by Now! CHORUS x2 CHORUS x2
10.
Tonight's the night, it's all been planned Preparing the kill site, you will not stand a chance Although you should have seen this coming When you fucked that filthy manwhore CHORUS: I'll make you disappear You'll know your time is near When I whisper in your ear: "Your life ends now, dear" There is no secret you can keep from me So how did you think you could just say nothing? What I'm about to do will not make things right But it will feel so fucking good CHORUS Tonight is your night You will rest in pieces And be carried away by the currents No trace of your existence shall be left behind You are reduced to nothing CHORUS x2
11.
Blood, it gleams so bright in the pale moonlight And the snow is not so white anymore Somewhat complete devastation The city lies in ruins But all hope is not yet lost Victory Tragedy Fires, fires burning bright in the gray moonlight But we won, at least for now And though survivors are scarce We bravely rebuild our lives Start over yet once again Victory Tragedy Victory Tragedy Death will take us all...
12.
Dolls' Night 04:00
Long ago, when anything was still possible There was a village of dolls in the middle of a forest On moonlit nights the dolls, they would gather In the nearby glade and dance the night away Chorus: Aaaah The forest comes to life Aaaah This is the dolls' night On moonlit nights the dolls, they would gather In the nearby glade and dance the night away Chorus Chorus
13.
Bleak Waltz 02:55
14.

about

This is a collection of finished songs that have only appeared on compilations, as well as some previously unreleased finished songs. I've also included some demo versions of songs on which I'm no longer working, either being unable (lost working files) or unwilling (lost motivation/interest) to do so. Mostly those are songs that are only missing lyrics and/or vocals.

The oldest song is from 2007, and newest one is from 2011. So that's where the album title comes from. I just want to finally share these songs that I've just been sitting on for years. Even the newest song on this album is at least three years old. I've written something about each song to give a little insight into the whats and whys.

The tracks on this album are arranged in roughly chronological order of creation, with the exception of the last three songs. Those are clearly less metal than the others, so they sit together at the end.

credits

released February 16, 2014

Everything is composed, arranged, sequenced, performed, recorded, mixed and "mastered" by ansgaros, except tracks 9 and 10.
Tracks 9 and 10 are performed by Hateflesh (which includes ansgaros on guitar and vocals).

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ansgaros Finland

ansgaros is just some random guy who likes video game music. He also likes metal music. In addition he likes combining these two into melodic, most of the time instrumental, sometimes even quite brutal, guitar-driven songs of some kind of metal variety. Usually. ... more

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